The article below is interesting. I've always thought most people look at boundaries as protecting oneself and not punishing others. That's why it's sometimes called, "healthy boundaries".
I had to place several healthy boundaries in the past few months--especially at work. As a matter of fact, on my bedroom white board, I have written on top, "Keep Work Boundaries!
At my place of work, it's common for store managers to give their employees false hope regarding promotions and department placements. I was one such employee of having false hope for 2 1/2 years! The interesting thing was, when the promotion/department placement was open that I REALLY wanted, I felt this odd, dark, melancholy inside me, although I was still happy about it, I kept wondering, how come I don't feel as happy as I should be?
I believe it was the Holy Spirit warning me about the position. I ignored the warning and applied.
I had waited 2 1/2 years for an interview that lasted less than 2 minutes! I was rudely, insultingly turned down (others were treated the same too, during their interview). I realized there were five people in on this giving me false hope....Afterward, for weeks, I was emotionally confused and angry. If anything, I was over-qualified, but they instead gave me nonsensical reasons not to hire me for the position--as they did other applicants; they were coming up with all sorts of excuses to turn us down. But I soon discovered I had dodged a bullet; the department managers are very toxic, and it was best that I stay out of it.
This is when I decided I need to set healthy boundaries for myself so not to let that happen again. I liked the five as fellow workers in the company and would talk to them besides work, like what I'm doing in my personal life, small talk, etc. Now I keep it strictly professional and ONLY discuss work with them, to help keep my heart safe. In this way, whatever they do, it's not emotionally hurtful, because I cut off the friendly attachment and keep things just professional. Plus, I have decided to do other things there...again as healthy boundaries. So not to "punish" them, but to keep my well-being intact.
Oh!--and one more thing: I listen to the guidance of the Holy Spirit and obey Him A LOT better now!
For more information on healthy boundaries, read the article: Healthy Boundaries
Email me for FREE spiritual or nutritional advice at: LoraJET@rocketmail.com
